In 2008 I was fat. I decided I needed to do something about it when I had 3 sizes of clothes in my wardrobe, none of which fit me. I had a defining moment when I was running a bath, and the bathroom we had in our house had a full length mirror. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and looked - actually looked - and had a bit of a moment. I was shocked. I lost the weight then and felt much better - kept it off - for a long time. Until this year.
Because fat creeps up on you. Fat is a ninja. Your brain will tell you all kinds of stories so you dont think youre as bad as you know you are. For example, you just 'wont wear' a certain pair of jeans. On a subconcious level, you know its because you wont fit into them. But your brain chooses not to try them on, not to 'feel like' wearing them. You just never select them from your wardrobe when youre getting ready in the morning. And one day, usually out of the blue, you'll have a moment where you realise youre fat. Then some time will pass, and you'll think you want to do something about it. But you dont. And then you'll have another moment where you see a photo and have a cry, desperately untagging yourself and you'll feel miserable for a day. Then you'll have a pizza for dinner because you want to cheer yourself up and then, in post-pizza sweats and guilts, you'll crawl inside the dominoz box and cry tears of garlic and herb dip. And on and on the cycle of denial and realisation and shame and self-flagellation goes. But for me, there is always one moment that comes where you make a decision to change things, because your very happiness depends on it.
I love clothes. And for me, this time around the delightful fat block, the latest "moment of realisation" happened when I realised I could not fit into any of my clothes on holiday. When I couldnt wear a swimsuit or even a vest top, and spent the entire time in a sloppy tshirt and leggings, watching other girls topless sunbathing by the pool and having a dip and wanting to punch them in the skinny face... [Wait, did THEY force me to eat the second block of cheese?] I sat there like a potato realising I had to change. I put on weight very very easily in general, same as a lot of women in my family, and I have to really watch what I put into my body. And I'd basically been sitting on my arse all year because of my leg, then living on cheese and bread and wine over Christmas... and holy shit was it showing. It was a cumulative weight gain which began when I tore my achilles in the summer and gradually got worse and worse until I was now resembling this guy:
So since I've come back from my holidays, and started this blog, and decided to finally "do something about it". Back in 2008 when I lost weight the first time, I discovered the joys of green drinks. These helped me fly back into a much smaller size last time I was heavier. So I've returned to my love of the green drink for breakfast, which Ive been having sporadically every since 2008. Green drinks have a million benefits, not least of all giving you your entire 5-a-day in one go, boundless energy (like, double espresso levels of enegry) and are incredibly hydrating. Theyre packed with nutrients, and a quick google of 'green drink' will bring you on a very weird rabbit hole journey into strange parts of the internet where people become evangelical about kale. Dont get sucked into this hole. It is awash with body shaming and terrifying raw food faddist and fruitarian propaganda. Seriously, these pages should come with ED trigger warnings, they are NOT healthy. If these people were not consuming their own body weight in kale, they would be on crack.
To make a green drink you will need one of the following:
- a juicer
- a high speed powerful blender (preferable, but super expensive)
Last Christmas my mum. brother and other half all pitched in to get me a Vitamix blender. I use this blender every single day, often twice or three times a day, and I'm in love with it. Its not cheap but its an incredible investment and a kitchen essential for me.
Making green drink in a Vitamix takes about 3 mins. You dont peel anything. You dont chop anything. You fire whole vegetables and fruits and a drop of water into the blender, a few ice cubes, and after 30 seconds on high speed, have a perfectly smooth drink (with no bits).
You can put anything in a green drink, but there is a general formula for mine:
- fruits x 2
- citrus (lemon or lime) juice x 1
- Greens
- Supplement
Todays green drink had these ingredients: 2 apples, a banana, a lemon, a carrot and a large bunch of kale, I usually have more but I'm broke at the moment! WHEN WILL JANUARY END OH GOD.
If youre using a juicer, you will have to chop these up. Leave the skins on though. Kale is absolutely amazing, dont scrimp on it. Celery is a lovely addition or alternative, as is ginger, spinach, pear and cucumber.
I also added a teaspoon of these:
Chai seeds are incredible - packed with calcium, manganese, and phosphorus, and a great source of healthy omega-3 fats. Hemp seeds are full of protien (so important because I'm vegetarian) and full of omega 3s too. These baby will also keep you full - theyre digested slowly and help regulate spikes in your blood sugar.
That's it - whizz all these together and enjoy.
I know youre probably thinking that this looks absolutely disgusting. But honestly, the greens DO NOT TASTE LIKE ASS. All you can taste is the fruit. You get used to the taste of the greens eventually so you can increase your dose. But honestly, this is a pharmacy in a glass. Ive been much healthier every time Ive had these for breakfast. If you have a cold it will be gone in half the time. And even my very picky and afraid of change other half loves these. And when I met him, he wouldnt make eye contact with a salad. Oh, and Dita Von Tease has one of these bad boys every day. And eh... who is going to argue with her?
Because fat creeps up on you. Fat is a ninja. Your brain will tell you all kinds of stories so you dont think youre as bad as you know you are. For example, you just 'wont wear' a certain pair of jeans. On a subconcious level, you know its because you wont fit into them. But your brain chooses not to try them on, not to 'feel like' wearing them. You just never select them from your wardrobe when youre getting ready in the morning. And one day, usually out of the blue, you'll have a moment where you realise youre fat. Then some time will pass, and you'll think you want to do something about it. But you dont. And then you'll have another moment where you see a photo and have a cry, desperately untagging yourself and you'll feel miserable for a day. Then you'll have a pizza for dinner because you want to cheer yourself up and then, in post-pizza sweats and guilts, you'll crawl inside the dominoz box and cry tears of garlic and herb dip. And on and on the cycle of denial and realisation and shame and self-flagellation goes. But for me, there is always one moment that comes where you make a decision to change things, because your very happiness depends on it.
I love clothes. And for me, this time around the delightful fat block, the latest "moment of realisation" happened when I realised I could not fit into any of my clothes on holiday. When I couldnt wear a swimsuit or even a vest top, and spent the entire time in a sloppy tshirt and leggings, watching other girls topless sunbathing by the pool and having a dip and wanting to punch them in the skinny face... [Wait, did THEY force me to eat the second block of cheese?] I sat there like a potato realising I had to change. I put on weight very very easily in general, same as a lot of women in my family, and I have to really watch what I put into my body. And I'd basically been sitting on my arse all year because of my leg, then living on cheese and bread and wine over Christmas... and holy shit was it showing. It was a cumulative weight gain which began when I tore my achilles in the summer and gradually got worse and worse until I was now resembling this guy:
So since I've come back from my holidays, and started this blog, and decided to finally "do something about it". Back in 2008 when I lost weight the first time, I discovered the joys of green drinks. These helped me fly back into a much smaller size last time I was heavier. So I've returned to my love of the green drink for breakfast, which Ive been having sporadically every since 2008. Green drinks have a million benefits, not least of all giving you your entire 5-a-day in one go, boundless energy (like, double espresso levels of enegry) and are incredibly hydrating. Theyre packed with nutrients, and a quick google of 'green drink' will bring you on a very weird rabbit hole journey into strange parts of the internet where people become evangelical about kale. Dont get sucked into this hole. It is awash with body shaming and terrifying raw food faddist and fruitarian propaganda. Seriously, these pages should come with ED trigger warnings, they are NOT healthy. If these people were not consuming their own body weight in kale, they would be on crack.
To make a green drink you will need one of the following:
- a juicer
- a high speed powerful blender (preferable, but super expensive)
Last Christmas my mum. brother and other half all pitched in to get me a Vitamix blender. I use this blender every single day, often twice or three times a day, and I'm in love with it. Its not cheap but its an incredible investment and a kitchen essential for me.
Making green drink in a Vitamix takes about 3 mins. You dont peel anything. You dont chop anything. You fire whole vegetables and fruits and a drop of water into the blender, a few ice cubes, and after 30 seconds on high speed, have a perfectly smooth drink (with no bits).
You can put anything in a green drink, but there is a general formula for mine:
- fruits x 2
- citrus (lemon or lime) juice x 1
- Greens
- Supplement
Todays green drink had these ingredients: 2 apples, a banana, a lemon, a carrot and a large bunch of kale, I usually have more but I'm broke at the moment! WHEN WILL JANUARY END OH GOD.
If youre using a juicer, you will have to chop these up. Leave the skins on though. Kale is absolutely amazing, dont scrimp on it. Celery is a lovely addition or alternative, as is ginger, spinach, pear and cucumber.
I also added a teaspoon of these:
Chai seeds are incredible - packed with calcium, manganese, and phosphorus, and a great source of healthy omega-3 fats. Hemp seeds are full of protien (so important because I'm vegetarian) and full of omega 3s too. These baby will also keep you full - theyre digested slowly and help regulate spikes in your blood sugar.
That's it - whizz all these together and enjoy.
 |
| Delicious green monster drink |
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| Lord send me this lady! |
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