Cauliflower rice is actually amazing - THIS IS NOT A JOKE.

For the last few months I've been (in the evenings) carb and (all the time except for cheats) dairy free, which meant I've been relying a lot on curries and other Asian dishes which normally have rice with them. There is something so satisfying about rice despite how utterly bland it is. I have been desperate for a no-carb alternative to rice, and kissed a few mealy, wormy, disgusting rice substitute frogs along the way. Then I discovered cauliflower rice.
HOLY. FUCKING. SHIT. 

First of all, unlike rice which is a big fat empty carby will turn to sugar nothing food, cauliflower is VERY good for you. After citrus fruits, cauliflower is your next best natural source of vitamin C. It's massively anti-inflammatory. Cauliflower is also packed with fibre, folic acid, and potassium contents. Cauliflower is like winning the antioxidant and phytonutrient lottery. Some studies have shown it to be cancer-fighting. Its an all-round good guy.

So here's how to make cauliflower rice. Step 1: put a head of cauliflower into a food processor and whizz. Step 2: put into microwavable dish and steam in the microwave for 7 minutes. Step 3: Add anything you like. Thats it. It is so ridiculously simple. I added salt, pepper, Udo's oil and lemon juice. My OH suggested pilau rice mix would be nice to add to it as well, which I'll try when we're eating Indian food next! You can fry it too if you're feeling saucy. And if you're feeling VEE saucy, throw a load of sharp cheddar on top of it and pop it in the oven OHGOD.

I'm incorporating cauliflower into my diet more by having cauliflower rice, and I'm going to try this recipe as a side, this recipe next because it looks decadent and amazing (but probably a cheat night meal...) and this recipe sans the lamb because OMGYOM.

I thought I'd share the recipe for a super simple dish I had last night and has been a regular staple in our meal rotation for years. I adapted the recipe from one on BBC by Bill Granger, the smug, self satisfied, Aussie c**t. That guy and his aryan children and perfect Sydney middle class life can go to hell.

Could you get any more smug Bill Granger with your perfect kitchen.

I'll share what I used to have with it before I was going carb-less too - pitta chips. They're LOVELY. My OH made a tzatziki to go with this which was gorgeous!

Chickpea and tomato chilli

Ingredients

• 2 tbsp coconut oil
• 1 red onion, finely sliced
• 3 garlic cloves, finely sliced
• 2 teaspoons freshly grated ginger - or use Garlic and Ginger paste from the Asian supermarket - an amazing time saver!
• 1 or 2 green chillies, to taste, seeded and finely chopped
• 1 tsp sea salt
• 2 X 400g/14oz tins of chickpeas, drained
• 80ml/2¾fl oz water
• 1 tsp cumin / 1 tsp corriander / 1 tsp cayenne pepper
• 1 tsp turmeric
• freshly ground black pepper
• 500g/17½oz cherry tomatoes
• 2 tbsp tomato paste or puree 
• 100g/3½oz baby English spinach leaves

To serve

• plain yoghurt or tzatziki
• pitta bread
• olive oil
• salt and freshly ground black pepper
• paprika - LOADS
• Cauliflower rice

Preparation method

1. Heat a large deep frying pan over a medium to high heat.
2. Add the oil, onion, garlic, ginger, chillies and salt and cook for five minutes (or until the onions are soft) being careful to stir regularly.
3. Add the chickpeas, 80ml/2¾fl oz water, cumin, turmeric and pepper and cook for five minutes or until the water evaporates.
4. Add the tomatoes and tomato puree and cook for another ten-fifteen minutes to soften, adding more water if it dries out.
5. Remove from the heat and check for seasoning.
6. Stir through the spinach and top with yoghurt/tzatziki.
7. To make the pitta crisps, cut the pitta bread into triangley bits and drizzle with olive oil, salt, pepper and paprika.
8. Bake in a moderate oven for 10-12 minutes or until crisp.

Aside from my new love affair with cauliflower, all else is going ok. My journey towards having a flat stomach (the ultimate goal!!!) is slow and plodding. I'm impatient and my resolve gets tested. But every day I show up to the mat. I push a bit harder than the day before. I add a little more movement into my day. I try new exercises and things to do to keep active. I exercise for at least 1-2 hours per day. I strictly eat according to my diet except for 2 cheat meals per week which I am LIVING FOR HUNTY. 

Sometimes I find the impatience is overwhelming and I feel like I'm not getting anywhere, so my trainer Chris told me to take progress photos (this was after a nasty bout of PMS and a run-in with a scales). Progress photos are ugly pictures you take of yourself in your knickers in front of a mirror so you can see, like PHYSICALLY SEE, the changes to your body over time. This has been helpful because when I think nothing is happening and life is a mess and I may as well have a wheel of cheese, I look back to the first photo I took and realise that I have changed. And slowly, slowly catchy monkey. And all that noise. (now fast forward to skinny plz.)