Update and current training/diet routine and some tuna salad

My blog has been sporadic recently, because things have been pretty busy and Ive been trying to fit in a hectic work schedule around all the rest of the stuff I want to do, like have a life that isnt work and exercise. So I thought I'd post a little update on how things have been going on the whole fitness front and how things have changed, which is pretty dramatically.

Its hard to believe that only six short weeks ago I started out on this journey by texting my friend Chris who is now my trainer asking him to coach me, and saying "I honestly dont believe I can actually shed a single pound". Magical thinking gone bananas. I had lost so much faith in myself and my confidence was so through the floor, that seriously, without a hint of exaggeration, I did not believe that it was within the realms of possibility for me to change my body. CRAZY PERSON BEHAVIOUR.

I started out small - I changed my diet and I began to exercise. I began by doing 15-20 mins of strength training per day, 6 days per week as per my trainers programme. I also cycled to work every day. At first... nothing happened. The nothing that happened was HUGE. A giant ball of nothing happening steamrolled over my motivation every single day, leaving me flat and uninspired like a puddle of piss on a plate. But then something happened. I lost an inch. I measured my middle bit - the most vast of the Michelin man folds, and ONE INCH OF THEM WAS GONE. That is this much.

That is something. That is not nothing. The nothing that was happening turned into something. Something small, but something none the less. I got stronger and more motivated with every single change, however slight. Soon, another inch was gone, then another, then another. With every step I take towards another inch, I get more and more motivated.

This motivation has helped me to expand my routine so that every day I'm pushing myself harder than the last - and this expansion is, in turn, giving me more results. But you have to expand SLOWLY. Or Scumbag Brain will know something is up and decide its WAY too hard and there is no point, and sure isnt there a new episode of Ru Pauls Drag Race there that would go LOVELY with a bottle of Merlot and a slab of chocolate. I wrote a while back that fat is a ninja, that it creeps up on you and ends up all over you before you realise wtf is happening. Now, I am using this tactic back on fat. Im creeping up on it. SCUMBAG BRAIN DOESNT EVEN KNOW I'M HERE, whittling away bit by bit.
So I thought I'd share my current routine with you and then at the end, an awesome recipe for tuna salad.

My daily routine (6 days per week with 1 rest day, cardio only)

7am 20 mins fasted cardio using Zcut Power Cardio (this will actually KILL you, its incredibly intense, but quite addictive and over before you know it. She's got a YouTube Channel too if you wanted to check her stuff out before splurging on DVDs).
7.20am Yoga cool down
7.35am 30 min power walk with the dogs
8.05am 30 min cycle to work
6.30pm 30 min power walk with the dogs (only every second day)
7pm 20 minute main workout, currently focussed on core work, push ups, squats, kettlebells but the exercises change from week to week, so next week it could be a lot of legs or upper body.

I'm having 6 meals a day on average, 1-2 are protein shakes post workout. I havent been hungry in 100 years and I dont crave sweet shit anymore... when I do I just have a smoothie with some extra fruit or a banana and that usually works ok.

Oh fuck you, Scumbag Brain

However, even though I'm stockpiling protein, my body has been craving fish. Ive been a vegetarian for 20 years, with a brief falling off the wagon from 1997-2000 and hopping back on again after a mushroom-induced reminder as to why I dont want to eat animal flesh. Ive always been incredibly staunch about animal rights, and was vegan for a long time. I try to eat a primarily vegan diet, but recently have been eating eggs on the weekend, greek yoghurt and, astonishingly, fish. I started craving fish about 12 months ago, and gave into the craving about 6 months ago and boy does my body feel all the better for it. When I do have a craving for fish, I just listen to my body and give it some fucking fish. I had to wrestle a lot with my conscience to come to terms with that, but after a while I just needed what my body needed. I had a mad craving for tuna today, so I made this sexual tuna salad and put it in a toasted pitta. Its absolutely creamy a decadent and fantastic. 

Avocado Tuna Salad from Tablespoon

1 large avocado, pitted 
juice of 1/2 lemon
1 Tbsp greek yoghurt
1 medium can tuna
1/2 red onion, chopped finely1/2 celery stalks, chopped finely1 garlic clove, minced
1/4 tsp salt1/8 tsp pepper 

Mash the avocado in a bowl, then add the lemon and yoghurt, mix, then add all the other ingredients. Simples! It looks gross but it tastes amazing, so I didnt even bother taking a photo, but here's an image from the site. You could also have this as a dip on celery sticks if you dont want to have any carbs, or you could go full retard with a sandwich (SHOCKER). <3 Enjoy. X

How to usurp Scumbag Brain.

Aside from all my other neuroses, I have some sort of weird deprivation complex. I am always a little bit afraid that I might be hungry. I have a thing where I have to finish everything on the plate. If someone offers me food, I never really say no. I hate quitting things, in case I miss them or need them down the line. I HATE the feeling of being deprived of something and if I am, I obsess over it. Scumbag Brain is my brain, all the fucking time. And I know a lot of people have to work hard to overcome Scumbag Brain in order to lose weight or maintain any kind of fitness regime. So I thought I'd do a post about how to kill off Scumbag Brain who is trying to sabotage you.

So in my weight loss and fitness journey, I have had to trick my brain into believing that I am not depriving myself of anything in order to make myself believe that everything is ok and its not a famine (I did the same when I was smoking and tapered off so gradually, Scumbag Brain didnt even notice). Back many moons ago when I was in college, I had a horrible relationship with food, and lets just say I plain old stopped eating for a while. I wont go into the details, but it was a very hard couple of years. By my third year I managed to sort myself out and began eating properly and taking care of myself, but I really screwed up my metabolism. I also developed a fear of being hungry from having a long time when I was, literally, starving. So in January, when I decided I needed to change my eating habits and start exercising, I had to do some mental acrobatics and confuse my little reptilian brain into not being scared off by the process, and not to be sabotaging me all over the place as per ususal.

The first mentality I had to get into was 'I am not depriving myself of anything'. This really, really helps to keep me on the straight and narrow. I can eat like a bird for a week but then I fall off the wagon and have a pizza, and Scumbag Brain will tell me Ive failed and there's no point in trying anymore.

The second thing I did was give myself permission to quit quitting things, so Scumbag Brain wouldn't notice anything was the matter. I decided I would get to losing weight by adding things to my life, and not quitting anything. Nothing was out of bounds.

I thought I'd share some of the things Ive 'added' to my life instead of quitting. This means that when it comes to the time of day where you'd crave chocolate, youve just had a banana smoothie and a huge lunch, and you dont really want the chocolate. Or youve just worked out for an hour and you look at a glass of wine thinking - I am choosing not to have this as it will undo all my hard work. My new motto is - no quitting - and that just adding good stuff to any diet and lifestyle will lead to ultimately making much better choices.

A list of things I've added to my life in order to quit quitting and usurp Scumbag Brain
1. Eat little and often between, then eat three good sized meals with plenty of protein and veg, and fewer carbs than normal (but compensating with extra protein and veg)
2. Add loads of vegetables to every meal. Silly amounts. Have a normal portion of your stir fry, chilli or whatever, then roast a load of sweet potato or peppers or broccoli and eat that alongside it until you're stupidly stuffed. Scumbag Brain doesnt really know the difference if youre binging on pizza or on vegetables...

3. Add exercise - even as little as 15-30 mins per day - and you'll find yourself not wanting to undo your hard work and taking more care of eating clean.
4. Add water - drink shit tons of water all day, you'll feel way fuller and it'll help keep your metabolism on track.

5. If you have a sweet tooth, use maple syrup or agave. Maple syrup is gorgeous and full of B vitamins, its much healthier than those artificial sweeteners which are poisonous if you ask me...
6. Drink green smoothies. If you don't have a high speed blender, you mightn't like to blend your own smoothies with spinach or kale, so add a green powder like spirulina, green barley, blue-green algae etc to some orange juice, bananas and berries. Greens will alkalize your body, give you a fantastic protein kick, and fill you up. They're a great way of shoe-horning in your 5-a-day if you don't like eating fruit and veg. Also, if you're doing strength training, replace your water in your protein shake with a green drink and get way more nutrition into your body.

7. Eat nuts. Nuts are filling, packed with protein and an amazing pre or post workout snack. If you dont like eating whole nuts, have nut butter. Eating nuts and nut butters before and after working out mean you wont have a massive sugar crash when you're done, and the protein helps with muscle recovery too.
8. Never leave the house without a banana. Because bananas are amazing and incredibly filling and perfect for making Scumbag Brain think youve just had something sugary.
9. Ive waxed lyrical about them on the blog before, but any time I feel even the slightest hunger pang, once I know I'm hydrated I eat an oat cake with hummus, salsa, almond butter or any other spread/dip.

And finally...

10. Ok I lied. I have given something up. I have given up listening to Scumbag Brain. Every time I hear a Scumbag Brain internal voice, I call it a scumbag and move on. This means no more beating myself up about being fat. No more feeling weak or telling myself I can't do it. I've also given up monitoring my weight loss so closely, instead giving myself kudos and a pat on the back every day for showing up to work out and for eating well. I'm starting to notice my body change, but more importantly, I have been noticing my mind change much more quickly... I'm happier. And at the end of the day, who gives a shit what you look like when you are healthy, strong and happy. And my brain isn't *quite* as much of a scumbag these days.